


get your swagger on

by sixbeforelunch



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012), The Incredible Hulk (2008)
Genre: Breakfast, Domestic Avengers, F/M, Gen, Leadership
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-14
Updated: 2013-07-14
Packaged: 2017-12-20 05:24:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/883434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sixbeforelunch/pseuds/sixbeforelunch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bruce shows his hand. Meanwhile, Steve is actually a pretty bright guy, he's just not fluent in paranoia. Fortunately, Tony is there to translate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	get your swagger on

"--yes, of course I understand, and I agree with you, but--."

"--not suggesting--"

"--missed you so much--"

"--I just--"

"--please don't--"

The voices faded in and out, and Tony could only catch bits and pieces of the conversation as he made his way to the kitchen. By the time he got there, the talking was over, and Bruce standing with his back to Tony, kissing a female someone with a shapely leg wrapped loosely around his thigh. 

"Good morning, Bruce, you dog." Bruce moved and Tony's already high estimation of Bruce went up by a few thousand percent. "Hello, Doctor Elizabeth Ross."

Bruce sighed. "Betty, Tony. Tony, Betty."

Betty smiled and held out her hand. "Mr. Stark, it's an honor to meet you. Bruce has--" she looked side-eyed at Bruce "--told me a lot about you."

Tony grinned and took her hand. "Genius cellular biologists who knocked over a heavily guarded government research lab to steal beyond top secret gamma radiation data before running off to presumably-though not even SHEILD ever managed to prove it--join her fugitive boyfriend in staying five steps ahead of Interpol and the entire alphabet soup of the US government get to call me Tony."

"Tony. It's Betty, then, please."

"Jarvis? How did Doctor Elizabeth Ross get into my tower without you telling me?"

Jarvis was silent for a worryingly long time, and when he finally spoke it was almost hesitant. "Though your words and actions suggest otherwise, I am only aware of two people in the kitchen at this time." Tony narrowed his eyes. "I am running a full diagnostic, but I am aware of no malfunction that could explain this."

Betty smiled and took off her necklace, laying it carefully on the counter. "Better?"

"...yes. Yes. I am now sensing three people in the kitchen, including Doctor Ross. I presume, sir, that despite the numerous warrants for Doctor Ross' arrest, you would prefer that I not alert the authorities?"

"I think we're good." He reached for the necklace. "May I?"

She nodded and Tony picked it up, holding it to the light. It appeared to be a simple gold chain with a circular pendant, about five centimeters in diameter. The pendant was maybe two millimeters thick, and the tech was, as far as Tony's highly trained eye could tell, invisible. He whistled. "Impressive."

"It took me nearly a week and a half to modify it for your computer--I mean Jarvis. It--he--was a challenge."

"I should hope so." His fingers itched to take it apart, but he restrained himself and handed it back to her. "Nice work."

"Hey, there's a strange pretty lady in the kitchen. When did you get here? Why did no one tell me there was a strange pretty lady in the kitchen?"

"Clint," Bruce said to Betty, and she nodded, as if that was all the explanation need. Which, it really was.

"This is Betty Ross," Tony said. "She snuck in...when, exactly?"

"Tuesday night."

That earned them a full-on both-eyebrows-going-up look of surprise. Three days Bruce had been hiding her? They were good.

Clint gave the pair of them the once over. They weren't making out any more, but the body language was enough. "Taken?"

Betty smiled at Bruce, and Tony was pretty sure there were a few milliseconds where she forgot the rest of them were there. "Very much so."

"Hnh," was all the reaction Clint gave, before he headed for the fridge and started pulling out the makings of the monument to gluttony that passed for breakfast among the Avengers. In their defense, they had to feed two people with completely jacked metabolisms, two people who burned more calories during their warmup than the average office worker did in two days, and Thor, who was officially banned from every all-you-can-eat buffet in New York state. Three dozen eggs really wasn't all that ridiculous, when you got down to it.

Tony usually stuck with a smoothie and a cup of coffee.

"Are you staying for breakfast?" Clint asked, stacking up five ham slices on top of the twelve pack of English muffins. Tony was pretty sure that SHELD had only let him get away with setting up a superhero clubhouse because it got them off the hook for feeding the freaks.

"I would like that, thank you," Betty said, and Tony gave her another little look over. He was temped to call too good to be true on her, with the bright open smile and the aura of genuine kindness that she seemed to radiate, but she had the same intense genuineness about her that Steve had, the one that set Tony's teeth on edge a little, because no one should be that exposed to the world.

Bruce pulled out a chair for her--of course he did--and set a cup of coffee, sugar no cream, in front of her before turning to help Clint scramble the eggs.

Natasha came in, soundless as always and said (and Tony didn't jump at her voice, really he didn't), "Doctor Ross. I trust you're settled in by now."

Bruce tensed, but Betty just continued smiling. "Yes, thank you."

"You knew she was here?" Tony asked, though he wasn't sure why he bothered. Of course Natasha knew she was here.

"She's been here since Wednesday."

"Tuesday," Tony said with a smirk.

Natasha nodded, and Tony couldn't tell if she was really unconcerned that Betty had managed to evade her in her own (sometimes) home for a full day or if she just wasn't going to give them the satisfaction of showing it. "We knew you were helping him when he was on the run, but we could never get eyes on you for more than a few days at a time."

"Betty's safety was and is my first priority," Bruce said, calm and collected in all the wrong ways. He didn't look up from the stove when he added, "And his."

Natasha just nodded. "Understood." She turned to Betty. "SHEILD will run interference with the military if need be. Making the warrants go away may take longer, so I recommend that you stay in the tower until we're sure that you won't be arrested walking in central park." She looked at Bruce. "That could be...problematic."

Bruce snorted, barely audible, and down a plate of buttered English muffins. Betty took one of the muffins and spread it liberally with peanut butter, but instead of eating it, she got up and held it out to Bruce. "Eat."

"I'm fine."

"Eat."

Bruce rolled his eyes, fondly. Because apparently that was possible? He took a bite of the offered muffin and held out a piece of bacon, which Betty proceeded to eat right out of his hand. Tony gagged a little on his smoothie. He was head over heels for Pepper, but he drew the line at feeding her. In public. At breakfast. When other people were trying to eat.

Steve wandered in then, and everyone loaded up their plate because once Steve got going, he really got going. He also woke up starving, but he was too much of a gentleman to start chugging his morning half gallon of milk before he was introduced to their guest, though he was eying the huge plate of eggs with hunger edging on desperation.

"We have a Betty now," Tony said, putting him out of his misery. "I don't think she and Bruce are the open relationship type, so don't get any ideas." He grabbed the last banana before Clint could get to it. "If anyone needs me, which no one does, unless something is actively blowing up and I am not the cause of it, I'll be in my lab."

*

 _The green wire's connected to the blue wire. The blue wire's connected to the red wire. The red wire's connected to the antimatter reaction chamber housing._ Tony sang the lyrics in his head but hummed out loud. Somewhere behind him, Steve was talking. Betty cooking up a pendant that could make her invisible to Jarvis he could deal with. That was just being bested by a superior opponent, fortunately a friendly one, albeit one that hadn't bothered to let him know they were playing. He wasn't thrilled, but he wasn't going to cry about it. He was just going to upgrade Jarvis to make sure that it didn't happen again. Ever.

But Steve getting into the shop to talk at Tony while Tony worked? That was just Jarvis being lazy. Or mean to him. Or liking Steve better than him. All of which were unacceptable.

"--was hoping that you could talk to Bruce. It's obviously a sensitive subject, and you seem to have a rapport with him."

Okay, the falling tone of voice and the long pause said Steve was done. So.

"Jarvis, what has Steve been blathering about for the last ten minutes?"

"Captain Rogers believes that the unannounced appearance of Doctor Ross in the tower is indicative of Doctor Banner's continuing distrust of his teammates."

Tony set down his soldering gun. "Wait, seriously?"

Steve blinked at him. Yes, seriously, his guileless expression said.

"That's what you got out this morning? Bruce doesn't trust us?"

"If he trusted us, he wouldn't have felt the need to sneak Doctor Ross into the tower, or to make it abundantly clear that he can and will disappear with her again if he feels threatened. Don't get me wrong, I understand, as much as I can without having actually been through what they have. Bruce has been running for ten years. I don't expect those instincts to go away overnight. But trust is an integral part of this team, and I think we need to address the issue."

Tony stared at him for a long, long time. Then he burst out laughing.

He laughed so hard that Dummy wandered over and made worried whirring noises until Tony shooed him away. "Steve, you paragon of mental health, what are you even doing here?"

Steve gave him the 'Tony, you aren't making any sense' look that had graced the faces of many an associate of Tony Stark.

"This morning, Bruce showed us in no uncertain terms how much he trusts us, and if you were a broken, paranoid freak like the rest of us--except Thor, but, well, Thor--you would have gotten that." Tony waved his hand to forestall Steven's objection. Amazingly it, worked. "It's not your fault you don't speak crazy. Allow me to translate."

Steve crossed his substantial arms over his substantial chest and settled into his patient face.

"Look, a good fifty percent of Bruce's schtick is being underestimated. I mean the other fifty percent is turning into the _Hulk_ , but even knowing that, it's very, very easy to dismiss the hyperopic physicist sitting in the corner as a non-threat unless he's actively turning green. This is a guy who," Tony started ticking items off on his fingers, "effectively evaded the US military for years, crossed multiple international borders without being caught, figured out how to continue his research into gamma radiation including publishing a few papers without letting on who he was, effectively hid his girlfriend from SHEILD despite them having eyes on him off and on for almost the entire time he's been running, and did it all while working a side job as a medical doctor in some of the poorest slums in the world."

"We all know that Bruce is an extraordinary man."

Tony snorted. "Yeah, you know it, but you don't feel it most of the time, because Bruce can hide in plain sight like no one I've ever met." He turned back to his workbench. "He doesn't do it consciously, I don't think. It's not because he's thinking that he wants to be ignored or intentionally misleading us. He just...feels safer that way." Which pissed Tony off in so many ways that he couldn't even start to think about it without needing a drink, and despite what people thought, he was aware that alcohol and highly volatile experiments did not mix. He set down the wrench he had been playing with and looked back at Steve.

Steve pulled over one of the rolling chairs and sat down. Tony ran his hands through his hair and stared up at the celing.

"If Bruce had come to me or you or SHEILD and timidly asked permission to bring Betty in, and gone through channels, and made noises about making her warrants disappear, that would have been Bruce making himself small and non-threatening and easy to dismiss." Tony grinned broadly, the full implication of what Bruce had done really dawning on him for the first time. "You know what Bruce did this morning? He _strutted_. And it was as beautiful as I knew it would be."

Steve was leaning forward now, watching Tony, uncertain, but completely engaged. Tony looked away for a second, because Captain America's full attention was a little disconcerting.

"Bruce--and Betty, I mean credit where credit is due; that girl is smart and tricky and I am stealing her for my R&D department the second I can get her to stop making eyes at Bruce long enough to pay attention to a job offer--but we're mostly talking about Bruce here, and he showed us his cards this morning. Not all of them, because that would be stupid, and none of us are going to put them all on the table, but I'd bet my favorite car that he showed us more of his hand than he's shown anyone not the love of his life in, maybe ever."

Steve was nodding now, getting it. "If we know what he can do, we won't underestimate him as badly. And if we don't underestimate him, it's harder for him to take us on, if he has to."

"Ding ding ding. Dummy! Give that man a prize."

Dummy rolled over holding an Iron Man plushy that Steve accepted with a smile and a pat on Dummy's arm.

Tony rolled his head back and forth, trying to work out a kink in his neck. "Honestly, I think the only one who was surprised at all was you. Maybe Clint, a little, because they never put Bruce on Clint's radar and he never had to study the man, but Natasha never underestimates anyone, and if anything I'm guilty of overestimating Bruce's awesome sauce."

"I wasn't surprised exactly," Steve said slowly. If it had been anyone else, it would have been defensive and a load of crap, but Steve always owned up to his mistakes, so Tony was inclined to believe him. "I wasn't expecting Doctor Ross' sudden appearance, but the fact that they pulled it off...that didn't really surprise me. I just don't understand..."

"Not being able to use your words."

"Well, yes."

Tony patted Steve on the shoulder. "That, my friend, is because you have actual emotional maturity and are significantly less of a damaged freak than the rest of us."

Steve frowned. "You aren't--"

"Yes we are," Tony said easily. "Now get out and let me work. I am done offering my services for free, and if you need any more freak-to-sanity translation, I am going to start charging you my standard consulting fee. Believe me when I tell you, you cannot afford me."

Steve set the Iron Man plushy down on the side of the bench. "Thank you, Tony."

Tony grunted.

*

"Bruce, I'm going to need you on this one."

"This doesn't seem like something you can smash your way through," Bruce muttered, not looking up from the file.

"I don't need the Hulk, I need you."

"Natasha can get into the lab and transmit the data--"

"Natasha is needed elsewhere, and it will be faster if you go in yourself. You are more than capable of getting in and out, ideally unseen, but I don't think that any guards you may encounter will be beyond your abilities. I've seen you with your jiu-jitsu instructor."

Bruce frowned at Steve. Steve just kept looking at him with his trademark 'trust me, I'm Captain America' expression. Finally, Bruce shrugged. "Fine."

Tony smacked Bruce on the upper arm with the back of his hand. "Hey. See the respect you get when you stop hiding your mad skills." 

"Clearly that was a mistake."

"No it wasn't," Tony said.

Bruce tried to look stern, but after a second his face relaxed into something that could almost be termed a smile. "No it wasn't," he admitted.

Tony grinned. "Alright. We're done putting Brucie in a corner. Get ready to strut baby. It's gonna be awesome."

It was too.


End file.
